“I don’t like being in that room….”
“I hate my living room!”
“This is the first room people see, and it’s ugly!”
These are actual things people have said when they first reach out to me.
A lot of these feelings came from comparisons.
Sometimes it was comparing their rooms to pictures in magazines, or on the internet. Other times it was comparing their homes to the homes of their friends.
Once I heard a woman tell me that she hated her living room and wanted it to look like the beach house living room on “Grace and Frankie,” even though she didn’t live near the ocean - and her house looked nothing like the set, lol.
I too want my living room to look like that set. It’s a vibe!
The thing that all these folks had in common was that they were comparing their “problem” rooms with someone else’s “ideal” room. They felt that their home didn’t measure up and that getting to the “ideal” was an impossible task.
Can you relate?
Dr. Ray Cummings and Teddy Roosevelt both said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” I’m sure the context for both was different then how you might feel about a room in your house, but the sentiment is the same: Something isn’t right and it’s causing you distress.
This distress is certainly fueling the way you feel and, worse yet, it’s likely stopping you from wanting to take action to change it.
As with many problems, action is the way to move past these feelings; and the actions don’t have to be major undertakings like ripping out walls or completely remodeling your house.
Here’s 5 quick and easy actions to stop hating your “problem” rooms.
Write Out What Irks You About the Room.
Green Chameleon
Get clear on exactly what you don’t like. Write it out, seeing it described in full takes its power away. You’ll go from unclear about what’s irking you, to being completely clear on what you need to change.
Be as descriptive as possible. That means if you hate the wall color, write it out.
“I hate this ugly green paint color. It looks like split pea soup!”
Hate your sofa?
“This sofa takes up the entire room and I can’t move around in here.”
Clutter making you lose it?
“I have no place to put all these books! I’m sick of looking at them stacked on every surface.”
Making a connection to the why you hate the room will help you get clear on exactly what must change to make you feel better about it.
This clarity can inspire you to make a list of projects that you’ll need to do to transform it into a place you’d like to be in.
Make Small Commitments to Keep Momentum.
Give yourself progressive goals to move forward with deadlines. Like:
I will pick a paint color to test, today.
I will create a mood board, after dinner.
Before work, I’ll start to find pictures that feel how I want this room to feel and collect them in one place.
These small commitments will help you keep a fire under your feet when things get busy.
Karolina Grabowska
Life happens and we all get distracted.
Having small, achievable commitments to keep you on track will help you stay motivated.
The important part is to not let momentum fade.
For example, if you want to redecorate your living room, make a commitment to do one step each day to help you make progress:
Day one: Make your descriptive list of what irks you.
Day two: measure the room so you know exactly how big it is and how big every section of the room is as well. (This should take 20 to 30 minutes…)
Day three: Start compiling a mood board so you can play around with things that look good to you.
This should be fun, so don’t make it an all or nothing project. You can always change your inspiration as you make progress.
Get Out of Your Comfort Zone.
Open yourself up to different colors or finishes that you’ve never explored before.
Houzlook
Explore other styles that you may have thought weren’t for you. You may be surprised to find there’s things that you love about them.
Don’t get caught up in design style definitions.
This is when you consider your style to be Mid Century Modern, but then a transitional looking console table steals your heart. You panic because you don’t know how to make them work together…
Furniture and interior design styles are progressive. They last for a certain amount of time and parts of them influence what comes next. So, keep that in mind and don’t get caught up in all the “rules.”
9 times out of 10, a mix of different design styles is what makes a room look and feel unique and elevated.
Find One Piece of Inspiration.
Polina Kovaleva
I’ve said this many times in the past and I have yet to find an instance where it doesn’t work to spark a direction for a design project.
This one piece is the anchor for the colors, feel and mood of your room.
It can be a piece of art:
Maybe it’s the colors in the art that make you happy, or feel relaxed, or it could be the scene in the art makes you feel serene or cozy.
Pay attention to the feelings that come up because those feelings are the keys for how you want your room to feel.
This is the opposite of making a list of things that irk you about the room…
It can be an area rug:
Do you love the pattern? Is it the feel of the rug because it’s soft and plush? Is it a particular style?
You can bring colors out of a rug that will influence the entire direction of a room makeover.
It can be an accent fabric:
Perhaps you’ve found a throw pillow that has the exact feel or vibe that you want in the space. Don’t ignore it because you think a pillow can’t influence the entire design of a room – because it can!
It’s ALWAYS easier to find the feeling you want to achieve in a room makeover from one anchor piece than it is to try to work backwards.
That’s why I say to always choose your paint color last.
What if you painted the room a color you like, but then you find a spectacular area rug that you love. You get it home and find that it clashes with the brand-new wall color…
Do you re-spend the money to paint again, or do you take the rug you love back? Either way, you’re lose, right?
So, choose an inspiration piece first and pull those colors out of it for a complete and cohesive room makeover.
Stop Making Excuses Not to.
This sums it up well:
If you think you can, you will. If you think you can’t, you won’t.
Making excuses not to correct what you hate about your room will stop you every time.
Lukas
I am certainly guilty of this…
Projects in my house can fizzle out in a nano second when I get in my head about everything else, I must do.
I’m busy with client work…
The days are getting shorter, and I need daylight to complete it…
I need to do x, y, z first…
Believe me, I struggle with all the issues I’m talked about here.
But what I can say for certain is, when I power through and get clear on what I want to change, and I keep my mind open to different things to inspire me, and make small commitments to move the needle forward, I find success.
Excuses are roadblocks to progress.
Don’t let them stop you.
There you have it, 5 quick and easy ways to stop hating your “problem” rooms:
Write Out What Irks You About the Room.
Seeing it described in full takes its power away. You’ll go from unclear about what’s irking you, to being completely clear on what you need to change.
2. Make Small Commitments to Keep Momentum.
These small commitments will help you keep a fire under your feet when things get busy.
3. Get Out of Your Comfort Zone.
Explore other styles that you may have thought weren’t for you. You may be surprised to find there’s things that you love about them.
4. Find One Piece of Inspiration.
It’s ALWAYS easier to find the feeling you want to achieve in a room makeover from one anchor piece than it is to try to work backwards.
5. Stop Making Excuses Not to.
If you think you can, you will. If you think you can’t, you won’t.
Up Next:
Decorating overwhelm often creeps up after moving to a new home or renovating your existing house. Both involve making lots of decisions and interacting with lots of different people. Here’s 5 fun ways to avoid feeling overwhelmed so you can make excellent decorating decisions.
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“Michael Helwig was top-notch, very professional and responsive to my needs. He allowed me time to explore ideas and try out a variety of combinations until we found the perfect fit. Michael provided detailed information and offered beautiful ideas to make my dream living room become a reality. The furniture he sourced has totally transformed my living room space. Everyone that has seen my new living room has one word, WOW! A special thank you to Michael for a wonderful experience.”
“Michael was very knowledgeable and guided us, with great patience and good humor, through the process of designing our dining room and helping us find the perfect sleeper sofa. He offered really helpful advice when we asked questions - which was often - but at no time did we ever feel pushed. He helped me when I felt like I couldn’t make one more decision. When my new furniture finally arrived I realized everything down to the pillows was perfect. I couldn’t be happier!”
Liza Summer
Michael is Principal designer and blogger at Michael Helwig Interiors in beautiful Buffalo, New York. Since 2011, he’s a space planning expert, offering online interior e-design services for folks living in small homes, or for those with awkward and tricky layouts. He’s a frequent expert contributor to many National media publications and news outlets on topics related to decorating, interior design, diy projects, and more. Michael happily shares his experience to help folks avoid expensive mistakes and decorating disappointments. You can follow him on Pinterest, Instagram and Facebook @interiorsmh.
