Do you believe that what you think can influence your life?

I do.

Simple thoughts like what clothes to wear to work or what to have for dinner can have an influence on how the day goes.

Think about that for a minute.

If you pick out an outfit that makes you feel good; one that fits great and wins you many compliments, it can make a huge difference in your day.

Getting a compliment on your outfit won’t change your life, but it’s nice to hear sincere compliments from the people and that can certainly brighten your day.

Contrast that with an outfit that you’re indifferent to. One that doesn’t have a flattering fit and that you only wear when you haven’t been to the cleaners or the laundry room in a while.

You reluctantly put your outfit on even though you know you don’t look your best.

Your least favorite outfit probably won’t affect your lifetime happiness, but it can affect your mood for a day.

Apply this logic to how you feel about your space.

If the only word you find to describe your living room is blah, you’re letting your thoughts affect your feelings.

A blah room is uninspiring and dull.

I’ll bet if you felt that way about your clothes, you’d go shopping for some new pieces or accessories to jazz things up, right?

You wouldn’t go years feeling that blah with without making some changes.

Why would you live with décor that made you feel that way and expect to feel differently without making changes?

Just like a new outfit, new throw pillows or an area rug won’t change the course of your life, but they can ignite a spark that inspires a revolution in the way you feel about your room.

How you think about your home will shape your reality.

That spark of joy will lead to another decision, and that decision will lead to another and so on.

Before you realize what’s happened, you’ll go from blah to inspired because you started with 1 decision.

Think you can’t decorate? Here’s 5 quick ways to change your thoughts so you can change your space.

1. Do a Quick Clean Up

Look around your room and notice the clutter or things that don’t belong there.

If you want a tidy bedroom where you go to retreat and you relax but you have piles of clothes in the corner or stacks of papers that don’t belong on your dresser, get rid of them!

Put the clothes away.

File the papers.

If you want a cozy, inviting living room but you have stacks of newspapers or tons of toys on the floor and on every flat surface, you’re not creating that cozy, inviting space.

Every room in the house has energy.

And the stuff contained in those rooms affects that energy both for good and bad.

Clutter, in any form, zaps energy and creates confusion.

It makes a space feel heavy and chaotic.

If your space is overwhelmed with stuff that doesn’t belong, even if it’s contained to one corner; that stuff will attract attention.

Like Tony Robbins and James Redfield have said:

Energy flows where attention goes.

Soon, even if you don’t add one more thing to the pile, you will spend your energy thinking about it and resenting the clutter instead of enjoying the space as you want it to be.

Look, I understand that it can be tough to keep things clutter free in a small space.

And I totally understand the struggle and accumulation of stuff from co-contributors: a spouse, children, pets. But one ruthless purge can be the impetus for major change.

Clear it out and make a deal with yourself to keep it clutter free.

You are the only factor that you can control.

Instead of getting angry or resentful toward your co-contributors for leaving a pile of clutter in their wake, get it cleared out of your space as soon as it lands.

This will send a message that your living room is not the family storage locker and the others will pick up on that message.

Being ruthless doesn’t have to be born out of frustration or negativity.

If you’re the one that wants a particular space to feel a certain way, it’s up to you to make that happen.

Keep the feeling you want for your space top of mind and work on keeping the clutter out.

You wouldn’t expect to start an entry level job and the next day become the CEO of the company, right?

It takes effort and consistency to do your job and it takes effort and consistency to make your home feel the way you want it to.

2. List the Things That Make You Happy.

Have you heard of a gratitude list?

It’s a list you make each day of 3 to 5 things that you’re grateful for.

It’s a simple and fast way to shift your focus from things that aren’t going great to things that bring you joy.

If your kid makes you proud, write down the reasons why.

If you’re thankful for your dog, write the reasons why.

If you love your job, list the reasons that make you continually show up and give it your all.

Be specific and not only list the people, things or events that you’re grateful for, explain WHY you are grateful for them.

The why is the underlining emotion or feeling that you get from something or someone.

It’s the strong feeling of joy or the pride that makes your eyes well up with tears when you think about why you’re proud of your kid.

Or the way your job makes you feel when you’re doing something important or has an impact.

The reason why can be more important than the thing itself.

Life occurs in a series of moments.

It doesn’t happen all at once.

So, start with what makes you happy and grateful now and watch how that will open the door to more things to be grateful for.

This is especially important if what you want hasn’t materialized yet.

If you want a living room makeover, acknowledge that you are grateful for what you have right now: a sofa to sit on, even if it’s lumpy and out of style.

Give thanks for electricity that works when you flip a switch.

Say a thank you for the fact that you have floors to walk on and a ceiling above your head.

It may sound trite, but life could look a lot different if you didn’t have those blessings.

Put that into perspective and let yourself feel what it would be like to not have those things and I guarantee you’ll appreciate a whole lot of things you take for granted pretty quick.

3. Start Small

Listen, you can’t expect to make colossal changes to your home’s décor in one day.

I don’t care if you have wheel barrels of cash or you’re Jeff Bezos.

Decorating, renovating, or building your dream house from the ground up takes time.

On the flip side, changing out the pillows on your sofa or adding a new plant to an empty sunny spot in the front hall can make a positive difference.

Here’s an example: Start small by adding a throw rug to the living, dining or bedroom.

This one small start will inform bigger changes to your space down the road.

Don’t believe me?

Say you find an area rug that you absolutely love. One that is exactly the look you want for your living room.

Even if it doesn’t go perfectly with what you currently have, you’re taking a small step toward making your living room over into the style you desperately want.

You buy the rug, slap it down, and really see that it doesn’t go with the throw pillows on the sofa and the pattern clashes with the curtains you’ve had up for a few years.

Before you get bummed that the new rug you love doesn’t quite fit your current style, sit with it for a minute.

Ask yourself, especially if you don’t care for everything else, does the other stuff in the space matter for the long term?

Another way to think about it is, would you get rid of the one thing that sparks immense joy just to keep the stuff that you’re totally indifferent to?

Probably not, right?

Instead, let the new rug inform the changes you need to make so that the room looks and feels the way you want it to.

Buying the rug you’re obsessed with can help you see the other changes you need to make in order to get the room looking how you want it to look.

One small step will inform all the other steps needed to make a huge change.

The truth is you don’t have to make all the changes at once.

Plan for the changes you want to make.

Go to the fabric store and get small samples of fabric to help you decide on making new pillows or curtains.

Start a Pinterest Board based on the rug and pull in art, pillows, upholstery, accessories so you can plan your progress with future small steps to take.

Do what you can in bite sized pieces.

Buy two new throw pillows for the sofa.

Get new curtains down the road.

A while later, invest in a new accent chair that looks amazing with the rug…

Before you know it, you’ll be making the space look exactly the way you want it to look right down to choosing a new paint color for the wall.

One small change can inform an entire room.

Positive momentum will help you think positive thoughts.

And, it can be as simple as getting your thoughts organized around one inspiration piece.

4. Don’t Compare Yourself to Others.

We compare things to give ourselves context.

But sometimes that context creates a story that isn’t true. Left unchecked that story can make us think that we’re lacking something.

When you see others having success, you might think:

“Why does so and so get all the breaks?”

“Why can’t I have that too?”

It’s good to strive for being better, but it’s so much more important to watch the language that we use in our heads while getting there.

Be careful of thoughts of lack because they will trigger more lack in your life.

To compare is to despair.

What we focus on grows, for better or worse.

I can’t tell you the number of times a client has said to me, “my mother, friend, sister, has great taste and she can decorate her house beautifully, but I can’t do it.”

What happens when you make a statement like that? You set yourself up for failure.

You declare that someone can do something that you can’t do.

That can bring up all kinds of sneaky comparisons like, “they’re better than me.” “They have great taste and I don’t.” “They can afford to do this because they have more money, a rich husband, better life…”

It can go off the rails fast.

It’s not that you can’t decorate just as beautifully as someone else.

The problem is the story you tell yourself is that you can’t do it.

When you program yourself to believe that you can’t decorate your home like someone else, the only thing you’re doing is telling yourself that you don’t have good taste and that you’re way of decorating isn’t good enough.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

What’s really happening is you’re afraid to make a mistake.

You don’t want to open yourself up to criticism.

The fix for that is getting comfortable with your choices.

Mom, friend, sister; they may have great taste, but they aren’t you and they don’t live in your house.

You have to get comfortable with making your own choices for your house - so that it reflects you.

If you make a decision that you don’t like, change it.

Take the rug back.

Return the throw pillows.

Repaint the wall a different color.

You can learn how to do anything.

There’s tons of blogs, YouTube videos and actual designers out there that can help you.

Invest some time in getting to know what you love.

You’re best friend may love Modern Farmhouse style and it looks amazing in her house, but Scandi/Boho makes your heart swoon!

Bottom line: be different. Be bold and know that you have taste and know there’s always a way to refine your taste even more.

Leave the comparisons for picking fruit at the grocery store!

5. Don’t Wait for Someday

“I’ll wait till the kids move out.”

I’ve heard this so many times.

Yes, little kids are hard on furniture. I get it, but there’s so many amazing, resilient and affordable fabrics and hard surfaced furniture on the market.

Just know there’s a solution for every busy household.

Here’s one that comes up more often than you’d think: “I’ll wait till the dog/cat dies.”

Seriously?

There’s an innovation on the market that is cleanable for old pets and lot’s of textures that aren’t attractive to naughty, young pets.

“When things settle down at work or school…”

Remember when I said life occurs in a series of moments?

Well, there’s always going to be another moment until you take your last breath.

In other words, it’s never going to be a perfect time to make decorating decisions.

Don’t delay a change that will make you happy now for a day that may never come.

All we have is right now.

That’s not meant to sound bleak, it’s the truth.

God willing, we’ll all live to a healthy and active old age but what good will that be if we get to the end and look back with a list of should of, could of, would of’s?

Yes, I’m sure you want to accomplish many more important things than decorating your house, but if making a stylish change to your surroundings will make you happy, why wait?

We’ve seen so much loss and change over the last 6 months.

I’m certainly not saying that making over your living room will compensate for any loss you’ve experienced during this global pandemic or heaviness that you feel because the systemic racial injustice that’s long overdue to be eradicated.

What I am saying is that if you wait for the absolute perfect time to make a change that will spark some joy in your life, you’ll be waiting a very long time.

There is no perfect time or circumstance.

There will always be more ambition than time. I write this to remind myself as much as I do for you.

Take the time to make your home feel the way you want it to be because someday is abstract and may not happen at all.

That’s the story, my friend.

Yes, it’s heavy on the woo this week, but I’ll tell you, what you think becomes what you live.

Take a moment to look back on the events of your life and focus on how you came to where you are in the present moment.

I’ll guarantee that you made choices to get to where you are.

If you really focus on the choices that sparked joy in your life you probably don’t have many regrets from those, right?

Decorating your house should not be something that causes you distress or fear.

1. Keep your clutter under control

2. Get clear on what makes you happy

3. Start small

4. Don’t compare yourself to others

5. And, don’t put off your project until someday.

Leave me a comment below to tell me how you’ve changed your thoughts around something that you wanted to do.

How did it change the outcome for that thing and was there anything else that helped you accomplish your goal?

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I write about small space design and decorating, sustainable furniture options, positive self care and a variety of do-it-yourself home décor.

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Michael is Principal designer and blogger at Michael Helwig Interiors in beautiful Buffalo, New York. Since 2011, he’s a space planning expert, offering online interior e-design services for folks living in small homes, or for those with awkward and tricky layouts. He’s a frequent expert contributor to many National media publications and news outlets on topics related to decorating, interior design, diy projects, and more. Michael happily shares his experience to help folks avoid expensive mistakes and decorating disappointments. You can follow him on Pinterest, Instagram and Facebook @interiorsmh.